April 25th, 2005

Current Music: She's Lost Control - Joy Division Time: 11:30 pm Current Mood: just peachy

I've decided I'm going to get my hair cut and dyed again on thurs.. i have bad hair that tries so hard to be an afro.. Thats about my news for the week.. not really done alot. Been at work and listened to 'its all about you' about 30 million times (almost) entirely against my will. Its on constant repeat at work (almost) Helen (guitar) works again now. Much better, stays in tune better now, when I replaced the coils. Hehe.. giant guitar mart on in town on the weekend. That could be a good sunday visit. Free entry if I have something to trade. *starts thinking of a new guitar.. hmm.. that could be my baby.. Gould 350 Black with string thru body <3 :) Anyway.. enough of that xx

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April 21st, 2005

Current Music: none Subject: Today I broke Helen Time: 05:52 pm Current Mood: angry

ARGH! Today is not such a good day. I woke up. picked up my guitar (helen not brody). walked out of my bedroom with her. hit her body on the door frame. examined the guitar broke a screw holding the bridge pickup in place. left the house (after all the getting dressed/breakfast shit)) paid for a screw went back home removed the scratchplate while removing the scratchplate snapped a wire connecting to the tension springs. left the house paid for a wire went back home left the house paid for a soldering iron went back home soldered the wire back into place decided that while i was there I would finally (after 4 months) fit my GK3 pickup to helen snapped the same wire again sawed the bottom off my scratchplate soldered the wire back into place (again) reattached my scratchplate fitted the GK3 pickup where the bottom of my scratchplate used to be tested my guitar on GUITAR:Neck pickup - fine tested my guitar on GUITAR:body pickup - minimal hiss tested my guitar on GUITAR:bridge pickup - feedback galore.... arghh! tested my guitar on GK3: Arghhhhhhhh the A string magnetron is broken.. and because it took me 4 months to be arsed fitting it the warranty is now void.. wooh there goes £60 bah guitar is fucked... no guitar at the minute.. bad mood.. need to get drunk.. no money.. argh.. fuck.. argh.. fuck.. pissed off lots bye

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April 11th, 2005

Current Music: Rialto - Monday Morning 5.19 Subject: Monday Morning 5:19 and I'm still wondering where she's been Time: 12:39 pm Current Mood: cheerful

Okay.. so I havn't updated in a while.. thats because I'm lazy I suppose lol. What have I been up to? I've had an entire full week off work which is wonderful. I have spent it doing such important things as sleeping, eating and drinking. During this entire weekof doing not much I managed to fail to get my phone charger from work, so have had no phone lol. lets skip to the interesting bits (if there are any) On thursday night I was DJ-ing at the SU. I was very apprehensive at first cos I know how bad the music usually is on a thursday night, and I had to stick to a similiar pattern. In the end it didn't go too bad, lots of cheers and claps and got to play quite a few tracks that were actually good!!! Ended the Night with some classic rock, everybody calmed down and went home.. everyone seemed to have fun anyway. After that we went to the George. Helen and Kat sung wonderfully on the ka-re-oke and stood and watched and danced. Then we went to Pure- -grr.. then we left and all went home. On friday night I went to the SU.. I thought there might be not many people there, because Helen and Kat went to see Merbou (sorry about the spelling lol) - thats Tariq, Kat's brother's band. I thought that Laura might be going though and I havn't seen here in like time so I thought I'd go anyway. Talked to Laura who seemed happy and bouncy! Drunk some alchol..danced a bit. Then Helen and Kat magically turned up from the abyss.. we all got drunk.. then we wen to the George and I gave Helen 2 screaming orgasms while I was having sex on the beach.. by this point i was very drunk hehe. Helen kept side parting my hair and trying to make me look emo i think hehe.. kat kept stroking my hair and telling me i was cute and drunk lol. At some point we wen to the Bulls head, but I didn't buy a drink there. Then we agreed to go to the pizza shop, so me and french alex headed off to the pizza shop. Helen and co disappear somewhere along the way so I decided to get on the bus if noone was about. Then Helen got on the bus and shouted at me to get off it saying something along the lines of 'what are you doing? I came all this way to the pizza shop with you and then you just leave.. well get off this bus and buy pizza now. People were staring at me so I got off the bus. We bought pizza but I got confused and bought the 'margaritta' instead of 'vegetarian' which was really strange hehe. Then laura left with a handful of chips and a sllice of pizza.. hehe.. don;t worry I'm not bothered ;p. Then Helen and I argued that I would be much happier if somebody walked her home (by somebody I meant Jobie! hehe! ) but she said she didn't need walking home - which was true she didn't need walking home - but I would still be happier if she did! Eventually jobie promised he would make sure she got home okay... I got on the bus and went home to sleep hehe! Saturday night I managed.. through the miracle of myspace.. to arrange to meet laura and helen in the Nelson that evening. I said I would be there at 8.00 so obviously I turned up at about 8.30 (reliable as ever!) and Helen and Laura and Hazel were talking about *CENSORED*..... This conversation continued for a good while. Then Andy walked past the window - then laura rung andy and said di you just walk past the window and he said yes and that he was coming back to the Nelson. Then Helen went to make a silent phone call while I went to the bar. we got back and 'old ian' was sat near us. Then we had discussion about ex's for a while and about how I went out with a troll whom I did not fancy! lol! which took some explaining. Then I saw a girl who used to stalk me throughout college called 'bitchface' so everyone started saying bitchface.. and then she came over and sat right between Helen and myself put a glass of wine down, and started talking in her annoying voice. Everyone was most scared and kept picking up the phone and saying 'Hello' which was most hilarious (although this description does it no justice lol). I drunk all of bitchface's wine as possible. She got all annoyed when I failed to introduce her to anyone, but I forgot her name and didn't think it would be very nice to introduce her as 'bitchface' even though evryone already knew what she was called (its louise btw). Then she insulted us all for wearing wrist-things ( "What are you all 12 or something" ) cheeky bitch. Then she stared at Helen for a while with eyes of burning lazer death (okay so this was an exageration, but i'm sure if she did have eyes of burning lazer death she would have used them on her). Then she insulted Helen in someway so I called her a bitch. Then we all laughed at her. Then I went to the toilet while she was explaining to everyone that - "we used to get off with each other all the time" - heh.. twice, both after i was plied with much alcohol. She is strange. Then we had to go and get lauras bus / train / coach / plane / boat. And left. With much laughter and just the slightest hint of fear on everyones lips. Then we all went home. Last night was Sunday night. I dj'd at the Nelson, which was pretty much a regualar affair. Played some tracks that I knew that the girls would like... and it was Jamies 30th so I played about 5 tracks for him. I finished at 10.30 finished my drink while sat with people.. then laura, helen and I went to the bus stop.. helen and laura got thier bus.. then I got mine and went home.. This morning I woke up and wrote this journal entry... Today I shall be mainly.. getting Zombiefied for tonights 'Wednesday 13 gig'.. wooh! xx

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April 4th, 2005

Current Music: Everything Starts with a Fuck - Alec Empire Subject: Everything starts with a.. Time: 06:00 pm Current Mood: self angered

FUCK! See even this post starts with a fuck.. so what uninteresting things have happened in my life... Oh I'll start with neglecting to mention that Helen was my bitch of Friday night after I leashed her to me, but then I decided I'd loan her to Ani (which seemed to excited both of them in equal measure.. lol). Then Jane told me off because she said I was her bitch, but then I explained that she was obviously Eddies bitch. She seemed to think is was okay to be two people's bitches so I countered with it therefore being okay to have 2 bitches myself... she agreed and thought it could be fun.. hmm ;p I am now enjoying my glorious 1.5 weeks off work. I want to play the guitar but my fingers hurt too much for no reason at all! On Saturday I was told by some friends I was meeting them in Rock Kitchen.. that wonderful place where everyone gets excited at the curtains opening.. so after having to turn down an invitation to be Helens guest at some random party or other, I met up with my friend Wayne to head of to Rock Kitchen.. I drnk some beer on the way and thought about going home.. unfortunately I didn't. I arrived in rock kitchen and queued for five minutes to buy a drink... I sat on a sofa in room 2 while some fool decided that he was going to dance on his own to every hair metal song that came on, like he was on stage.. everyone was laughing at him, but he was in his own little world.. the DJ in room 2 then refused to play 'The Distillers'.. Found one person I was supposed to be meeting who told me no-one else was coming and then disappeard for most of the evening. Then I danced to something or other on the dancefloor of the main room.. THEN then most exciting thing in the world happened... the curtains opened, all of a sudden 25ish more chairs were availible to sit on.. the rush was immense.. the passion building up as people were literaly thrown out of the way for a mere chance to view these chairs in unsatupon condition. Tempers flared and voices rose.. then everyone calmed down and the night continued... then i went to the bar for 3/4 of an hour.. then wayne disappered.. then my ex-girlfriend Sarah appeared and danced with me, appears she was back from Dundee for the weekend. She asked who I was with and didn't seem to believe when I explained that the people I was here with have disappeared. Then I had some more alcohol... Then I went back home with her, where contrary to what her friends have said, I did not sleep with her. Why did I go there.. who knows, maybe it was my insecurities showing, maybe the promise of a free taxi, maybe just the fact that I seem determined on every possible occasion to do the exact opposite of what I actually want to do. Anyway that little chapter of my life is well closed again now. ARGGHHHHH. 'Everything starts with a FUCK. that makes everything, in the end, fucked up' *i'm just going to stick my head in the sand and hope it all goes away* Wheeler xx

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April 2nd, 2005

Current Music: As Starfire burns upon the ice-veiled throne of Ultima Thule Subject: Papal Choice Time: 12:25 pm Current Mood: bored

Hmm.. Havn't updated for a while so I guess I better had do :) Well the pope is on his deathbed (cue sound of harps and flickering images of winged cherubim), or has aleady died and they are starting the preparations for the next one... I have decided that the next pope is going to be a lovely man named 'Godfried Danneels'. So I supposed I'd better let the Catholic Church know,'cos I'm sure they're having a lot of trouble deciding! hehe So what Interesting has happened in my life.. erm spent a lot of time on myspace to pass the hours of the day, getting like a million messages everyday (Well somewhere between 5 and 30 anyway), but I'm getting a bit bored of replying really! heh Thursay and Friday night went to the SU. Last night watched some of my best friends try and sort out thier complicated lives. Tried to help as best as I can, but I'm not good at these sort of things really. Hope everything will get sorted and everyone can be happy again, cos thats all I want for all my friends to be happy! Kat kept on accidently calling me Helen. I didn't think I looked that much like a girl!!! bah ;p I am also apparentlyy a clone of the guitarist from Bloc Party! I just looked at a photo of the guitarist and I look nothing at all like him. Both skinny but thats about it. After the SU on fri, we went to the George. Lots of people were there. Talking to Laura who was friends with my ex girlfriend Sarah. Shes doing fine which is good. She isn't still with the f*cking pr*ck she was going out with when i was going out with her, which is good! Her life however appears to be full of fun happiness and romance is always close! Bah! Thats not fair, I should be the one who found happiness and love while instead I wallow in my own self pity( cue overdramatic head swipe )... I had sex-on-the-beach with Helen and Kat, Then with big Martin, Laura and Nat. Then we went to the Bulls head. I chatted to graham and nadia. Then I went and got the bus home! hehe. The End xx

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March 27th, 2005

Current Music: Teleportal - One way In Subject: Tedium Time: 01:37 pm Current Mood: cold

Last Night I didn't go out. I stayed in and watched mindless TV including the new Doctor Who? Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but Billie Piper really can't act, no matter how much she 'wants to!' Watched half of traffic then went to bed. Ahh well Nelson tonight. At least that should be fun! xx

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March 26th, 2005

Current Music: Wednesday 13 - Songs of Death, Dying and the Dead Subject: Bored still - silly quiz Time: 06:09 am Current Mood: chipper

_______Favourite________________ 1. gum: not a gum fan... alot of the 'vegetable oils' is actually whale blubber.. :( 2. restaurant: Who knows 3. drink: Absynth 4. season: Summer or Winter 5. type of weather: Warm or Snowy 6. emotion: we have a favourite emotion.. happy i suppose 7. thing to do on a half day: fill out LiveJournal Quizes 8. late-night activity: Sex 9. sport: Snowboarding 10. city: Manchester.. where else.. but really erm Figures is cool 11. store: Afflecks!! _______When was the last time you_______ 12. cried: I really don't know to be truthful 13. played a sport: Haha.. I played football in the park the other day 14. laughed: Last Night 15. hugged someone: Yesterday, Helen and Kat 16. kissed someone: Hmm.. sometime just after Christmas 17. felt depressed: Tuesday 18. felt overworked: Everyday I'm at work which was last Friday 19. faked sick: Never..ever lol.. like I'd admit it ___What was the last_______ 21. word you said: Glyph - to my mum as a crossword answer 22. thing you ate: 5 fake wheatabix ( Nestle own real Wheatabix) 23. song you listened to: Wednesday 13 - Bad Things 24. last thing you drank: Lemonade 25. place you went to: The Bulls Head 26. movie you saw at the cinema: Team America 27. movie you rented: The Grudge.. shame _______Who was the last person you_______ 28. hugged: Helen and Kat 29. cried over: Sarah, my Ex 30? 31. danced with: Kat and Helen 32. shared a secret with: Nobody.. 33. had a sleepover with: Lee collapsed unconcious on my bedroom floor after we drunk a litre of vodka does that count?? 34. called: Wayne 35. went to a movie with: Jenny, my Ex 36. saw: my mum about 1 hour ago 37. were angry with: Anger?? 38. couldnt take your eyes off of: No Comment 39. obsessed over: Not really one for obsession myself _______Have you ever_______ 40. danced in the rain: at every opertunity 41. kissed someone: Yes.. I remember kissing people once lol 42. done drugs: yes 43. drank alcohol: yes 44. partied 'til the sun came up: as often as possible 45. had a movie marathon: yup.. but not for a while 46. gone too far on a dare: yeah.. I went to Prague... haha 47. spun until you were immensely dizzy: Yup _______Play_______ 55. i'm feeling: slightly hungover 56. i'm listening to: Wednesday 13 - The Ghost of Vincent Price 57. i'm doing: Nothing much at all 58. i'm talking to: Noone.. wait let me rephrase that (i'm not talking at the minute) 59. i'm craving: a drink of coke i'm so thursty 60. i'm thinking of: What to play at the Nelson tommorrow 61. i'm hating: people keep on asking me if I'm alright _______Love_______ 62. love is: <3 63. my first love: Charlotte Hazledine.. she left me for an older man lol 64. my current love: don't have one I'm afraid 65. love or lust: Love is good because I can't act on lust 66. best love song: Mansun - I can only disappoint you 67. Possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time: probably not 68. when love hurts: its f*cking shit 69. is there such thing as love @ first sight: lust at first sight maybe.. love can't be based onjust physical attraction _______Opposite sex_______ 70. turn ons: Interest (bordering on obsession) in Music, Good Hair (which is very relative to my opinion), Dry sense of humour 71. turn offs: self obsession, designer clothes, conventional looking people 72. does your parent's opinion on your gf/bf matter to you? heh 73. what kinda hairstyle are you into? Dyed black usually works but erm.. something strange if not black 74. What is the sweetest thing a girl/guy can do for you? Actually think I'm pretty rather than just saying it lol 75. where do you go to meet new people? Anywhere outside my house 76. are you the type of person to HOLLA and ask for numbers? Not me.. I even panic when people ask me for my number and usually end up telling them I don't have a phone _______Picky Picky_______ 77. dog or cat: Cat.. cat.. cat.. cat.. cat 78. short or long hair: Long 79. sunshine or rain: sunshine 80. hugs or kisses: Hugs work well! 81. summer or winter: summer / winter 82. written letters or e-mails: written letters, emails can work though 83. nintendo or motorcycles: erm.. not into bikes so I'll have to say Nintendo 85. house party or club: Club then house party :) 86. sing or dance: a bit a both 87. freak or slow dance: Freak all the way _______Lately_______ 88. How are you today? I'm okay 89. what pants are you wearing right now?: Black Cord Baggies 90. what shirt are you wearing right now? Sweet and Innocent 91. what does your hair look like at the moment: emo 93. how is the weather right now? warm and sunny 92. what song are you listening to right now? Hmm I'm listening to the Wedsneday 13 album, what do you want.. a tracklist?? 94. who was last person you talked to on the phone? Wayne 95. last dream i can remember? Something about guns, cheese and Eastern-Bloc countries.. meh Wow.. that filled in time xx

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Current Music: Kenicke - Nightlife Subject: Its Saturday Now Time: 04:40 am Current Mood: tired

I'm not going to start this entry with 'well...'. I only started with that sentence because I could think of only one other way to start and it wasn't going to be that. So, what has happened in my life since yesterday... Yesterday evening I went out to the SU. All was good and I chatted to Paul, and Will (the upstairs and downstairs dj's). Then I talked to my brother for a bit, and had a conversation with Ginge and Stuart about WOW. Was playing online with Ginge and Laura while they were trying to babysit a continuously vomiting baby. hehe. (french)Alex asked me if i could get him a copy, but I am not (contrary to popular belief) a miracle worker... £150 on Ebay.. my god.. for a game.. eek! Anyway.. then I went to play some pool but couldn't be arsed once my game was due so I let other people do it instead. I wandred some, chatted to some randomers, then Helen and Kat turned up. I was bored and waited at the bar while they got served. Then they vanquished for a while, so I wandered and talked to Chris the Pirate for a while.. in fact I say talked but really Chris the Pirate, his girlfriend(what is her name?) and I were inventing the 'New Greetings Symbol' (well perhaps I'd better step back a little [here comes the subtext!]. Chris the Pirate decided that the Vulcan 'V' symbol from Star Trek was the 'new symbol' and his girlfriend and I disagreed on the grounds that trekkies [trekkers??] had been trying it for a good many years and it hadn't worked. Also Chris' girlfriend thought people might think that we were trekkies/trekkers and they are a bit wierd [she says talking to a guy who thinks he's a pirate and a guy in eyeliner wearing a girls skinny fit top!]. So we decided that we'd 'make' our own symbol [and that's the end of that subtext] ). The 'lets find a new symbol' soon degenerated into 'lets see how wierd and twisted we can make our hands look. Chris the Pirate screamed like a little girl when I twisted my thumb over the back of my hand and wrapped my fingers around each other. Then we stopped because people were looking at us very strangely. EEK.. now we step back in time to earlier in the evening (yes I know in this modern day and age I can actually use the up arrow and just insert it, but where is the creativity and reflected thought process in that, beside strange things can happen when you step into the past hehe) Anyway, shortly before Helen and Kat arrived Stuart stepped up to do his weekly spot on the microphone, but this weeks announcemen was no joking matter, no trivial 'stop eating your girlfriends face at the bar or I'll poor vodka over your head and light it' or something insignificant like 'You're not being served if you don't say please'.. it was far more important than that, some may argue that this was one of the most important announcements ever made in the history of mankind. While I cannot truely attempt to recreate the atmosphere, the intonation, or even the exact wording of the statement, it went a little something like follows: "Friends, Romans, Countrymen, and just c**ts please lend me your ears (or just use them for a f**king change. I would like you to know that this is not my choice, if it was you'd be out of here by 9.30 so I can go home and drink and sleep. But, due to alcohol trading laws for social clubs (which the SU is by law) on Good Friday the sale of alcohol will cease at 10.30 sharp. Out of a gesture of my good will and stupidity we will stay open until 11.30 as per usual. So, please buy all the drinks by 10.30 to keep you going until 11.30. But, be aware any drinks will be forcably removed from your hands at 11.30 and you have to vacate the premises. Have a good night." Now I have a major problem with that. I am not Christian. In fact I don't even believe in that which the world terms Gods. Even more importantly the whole catholic christian dogma has distorted the whole situation. Good Friday (or long friday, or 'he hagia kai megale paraskeue' [the Holy and Great Friday]) has nothing at all to do with the crucifixion of Christ. It is yet another example of the Cult of Jesus Christ stealing another religion festival to fit in with everybody else. Paraskeue, meaning simply preparation, happened every friday in the Greek religions and it wasn't until the latins came in to play that it became confined to one day a year, which was then later attibuted to become God's Friday, then Good Friday, the attachment of the crucifixion was simply convienient. Now more importantly onto the important part.. what happpened at Paraskeue? Well it was one of the two major important feasts of the year for the Latins (by Latins btw.. I refer to the Holy Roman Empire and its associates), the preparation (hence the name) for this feast took up all of the day and lasted until the early evening. [now the important part]. These feasts consisted of all kinds of food, meat and wine and lasted until the early hours of the morning, sometimes until the dawn of the next day. So in what kind of fucking society do we celebrate a feast lasting til the the early hours of the morning by closing bars early... bah I don't know but I think we should stop doing these stupid things for no reason at all. Anyway let skip to where I was in this story before.. After all the finger twisting, I left Chris and his girlfriend (although their part in this story is not yet played out) and wandered in search of 'the girls'. The search was short.. I found them within seconds. I sat with them and by now they had consumed much of the bottle of wine, and were ready to start dancing. Something came on, I have no idea what. They danced. I went to the bar and bought me and the girls some WKD blue. Then little Ash came up to me and told me he wanted to take me home and make sweet love to me.. now in my opinion any sort of conjourgation between Ash and myself could never be described as sweet (in all reality it should never be described).. luckily my mouth uttered the word 'No' and that whole den of depravity was avoided.. meh. At some point Closer by NIN came on so Kat, Helen and I went to dance. By the end of the song I was entangled in a thrash of pseudo-lesbian limbs, and there was quite an audience sat watching. hehe.. not watching me I must point out lol. We went and sat back down again and drunk some more. Kat and Helen did various dancing stints while I sat and talked random bollocks to Gav for a while. Then the 10.30 deadline arrived so I went to rearm with WKD blue. I gave the girls thiers and went to sit in my corner for a bit (now let me clear this up... the corner has been: always my corner; is my corner.. just because it is mainly occupied by the little girl and her canibalistic boyfriend is irrelavent and is a great symbol of my generosity and goodnaturedness [if thats a word] ). While there Helen made some new friends (one of whom was a girl who promised to give me one of her wrist bands a few weeks before but then ran away). I promised Helen I would make a MySpace account (apparently like LiveJournal just a little more emo lol) and Kat asked Annie who the other person who looked like her was (you know the other boy/girl I thought was quite attractive).. It was her twin but I forgot her name.. Helen said it was all her lesbian fantasies come true... I laughed but agreed. hehe. Then I noticed I was reaching the end of my drink, and there was no more drink in sight.. I stole a little of Helens (well I bought it neways lol) but then it was leaving time anyway.. so all of the rant about 10.30 was irrelavent when applied to the SU (but reveals its ugly head again later) [now for anyone thinking this most maybe going on a long time.. consider this.. this whole post has already been completed once, but livejournal told me it was backdated and couldn't post it.. then I couldn't get the post back. I swore a few times and started again.. god I'm bored, or sad, or both lol] Neways. We left the SU and I chatted to some randomers outside while I waited for everyone going to the George to turn up.. I walked down with Helen and Kat until we reached the doors to the pub. I thought Scott was having an arguement with some chewer so I stopped to see what was going on while Kat and Helen went into the Pub. Scott wasn't having an arguement it was some guy arguing with his girlfriend (ex by now i would have thought) about him throwing her bag over the bridge with her makup in it. I decided I would head in but was denied as the bar had closed (Helen and Kat obviously allowed admittance being female and all heh). Finding myself stuck with Darryl and Scott (and maybe Jobe I forget) who were hovering outside the exit near to the arguing people, I decided I would go and sit in the spot where Laura sits when she doesn't get in. While I was sat there Scott came round the corner and asked if I was alright... I was and told him so. One thing I dislike is people asking if I'm alright when I am. If I'm not alright and I want to talk to somebody about it I'll let them know okay! He went back round the corner and then about 2 minutes later Jobe appeared (or whomever was in Jobes place if Jobe was already in there.. I forget) and Asked me if I was alright.. I replied that I was again, and was then informed that I wasn't smiling. Well I tend to smile for a reason and unfortunately I wasn't spawned with a smiley expression permanently on my face, its kind of a more distant, staring into space look. I can this state being 'Priathic' hence the handle.. heh. I don't smile very often, anyone who knows me will realise that. ;p Anyway shortly afterwards, The George closed. I heard my name being shouted from around the corner by (french)Alex. I jumped to feet. Alex asked me f I was alright and why I had been sitting on my own. I explained that I was fine (again) and was just thinking about sh*t.. he said thats good idea sometimes. I told him my head would explode if I didn't.. we laughed and headed to the Bulls Head. We got to the bulls head and I bought some drinks (well I went to the toilet first but that's really unimportant). The barmaid asked me if I was Tommy Harris son and called me 'GothBoy'. I could have aggrivated the situation but seeing as she was issuing the drinks I just smiled and luaghed. We sat down on the edge seats near to where Pete's band performs. Alex started telling Kat that the picture of a white guy (i forget who now) on the wall was actually (somebody else whom I forget now, but for the sake of the story lets call him Mr. T). Now Mr. T was quite obviously black, but Kat believed us anyway. Tht meant everyone ganging up on Kat and saying all the pictures were of people with a different skin colour... lol. Kat told me the story about her family visitor from Pakistan but I had already read her journal so already knew that lol. Jobe and Helen were deeply involved next to me so they didn't really have much to say lol!. Scott asked me if I was alright about 1 million more times so I wanted to write it down for him in case he was deaf but I had no pen. Old Ian came and joined us for a bit and said all my friends were 'really nice' (awww!). Then the barmaid told us it was time to leave.. or in fact she said 'Come on GothBoy time to go'.. but in a friendly way. Once we left their everyone decided they were going to the Den of Evil called 'Pure'. I was getting a bit tired and refuse to go to Pure so I went and got the Bus home (and it arrived at the stop the same time I did wooh). This is where the post would usually end but.. I was then kept awake all night by: next doors dog barking, scallies on the school opposit my house, car alarms going off all night, the sun rising at dawn and the caffine in WKD blue. So I had no sleep got up and decided to update my journal hehe. Now I just need to figure out what to do tonight!! (oh and make my MySpace at some point) Peace Wheeler xx

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March 25th, 2005

Current Music: The Mars Volta - Deloused at the Crematorium Subject: ( subtext ) Time: 06:23 pm Current Mood: contemplative

Our world is run and ruled by subtext. That is not to say that as a species we are underhand, sneaky, or sly at all. The most important things to us are left unsaid and only cryptic suggestions (or hints) are given. When (for example) completing manual labour and somebody isn't pulling thier weight, it is very rare to hear somebody being asked to help, hints are made instead. People remark its hard work, and how its taking longer than they thought, harder work than they thought.. etc. It is like people are afraid to say what they think (or implied, think what they say). We watch people, our friends, our family lie to people everyday. Simple phrases such as 'It'll only take a minute' taken literally are an outright lie, but we do not interpret it in that way. The phrase is a simple indicator that there is a job to be done that has the chance to be completed quickly but won't necessarly be so. Even the second sentence in this paragraph suggests that what I state in the sentence is, quite frankly, not true. By saying I do not wish to suggest that we are underhand in itself achieves that aim. We live our lives reading between the lines, taking a start point, a finish point and formulating the route. Along the way people leave markers, suggestions not of where to go, but where not to go. We follow a route that seems the most suitable given the circumstances, the style of prose, the setting, the vocabalary used, the length of the sentences, the length of words (in speech, the tone and inflection ). These are areas along the way that we maybe have to pass through, or maybe avoid. If something is important, we rarely write just what is wanted to be written, but surround that with suggestions of the route. Its is almost as if we feel we have to guide somebody to what we want them to do or how we want them to feel. The similie is very often an important part of th subtext, the implied, the unwritten and unsaid. Robert Burns did not win his lady by simply saying 'I love you' he won her heart with 'My love is like a red, red rose'. From a literal point of view this phrase in nonsensical, how can love be like a red, red rose. Even from that point of view we call the implied we can see he is suggesting simply in this statement that 'He Loves', but there is no target. The statement relies, not at all on the content of the sentence, but the way in which this sentence is first applied by the delivery ( the start and end points ), with the route being suggested in the similie. If i write the sentence out in common phraseology we get "My[I] love[love] is like a red red rose ( I love you )" That which is emboldened is the implied, while that in plain type in brackets is the subtext. What am I talking about here, and what has Robert Burns got to do with it? Nothing at all. What I am talking about here is brackets and subtext. Ever feel like subtext sometimes? Ever been that which needs explaining even after you think you've worked it out? Sometimes I don't just feel like subtext, I am the subtext. Sometimes I am the joke that everybody laughs at but no-one really knows why. Its not a bad thing, and it didn't really need to be said. Everybody is subtext from time to time. Its just the way it is. The most important part is just get from A to B and follow the best route you can. Peace Wheeler xx

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Current Music: Nirvana - Jesus Don't Want Me For a Sunbeam Subject: Cyanotyping and the Jesus Tree Time: 01:53 pm Current Mood: creative

I'm going to make some more cyanotype.. that'll be fun.. but I may have blue fingers later.. Off to buy some cyanide.. then I'm going to lock myself in the pitch black of my attic for a while... And in a few days I can have some more photographic fun... Then I might make 'The Jesus Tree', just need about 3 metres of OHP transparencies.. and a good tree :) xx

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Current Music: Wheeler - Autistic Subject: a-U-t\-i*S/-t\I-c Time: 12:05 pm Current Mood: chipper

She Lost, and can never return to Her Life, living inside of herself Never, knowing outside her world Each Child, a small fragment of Dream. I see Butterflies floating on the breeze and I guess its ain't enough to bring me to my knees In an abstract way you are creation yet eugenics would see the end of you all In my world, full of sepia you paint violent pictures on my wall In a flurry of colours violent pictures on my wall No way, no escape from it all and she, knows no different always, trapped inside within her mind. Spare her, she keeps me alive. I see Butterflies floating on the breeze and I guess its ain't enough to bring me to my knees In an abstract way you are creation yet eugenics would see the end of you all In my world, full of sepia you paint violent pictures on my wall In a flurry of colours violent pictures on my wall

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Current Music: Mansun - I can only Dissapoint you Subject: Another spring day! Time: 11:34 am Current Mood: bored

Well... Yesterday I did absolutely nothing all day. I played a bit of guitar and sold off some of those old VHS I have, seeing as I've either got them all on DVD now, or didn't want them anyway. Also sold some of my Manga DVD's I'm not going to watch again!! Anyway the shop tryed to give me like 5 quid for 3 dvd's - no chance - but the guy kept telling me how he wanted a manga collection but they'd put those on sale for 3 for £20 and he didn't want to pay that much. I suggested he pay me £10 for them and I won't sell them to the shop!.. we both win. He agreed (I won a little bit more) so he walked to he cash machine with me and.. tada.. a nice crisp £10 note... hmm tried to make that story a little exciting but failed. What shall I do with myself today before I go to the SU... well I could start making myself beautiful, but it never helps lol... I could fly a kite.. it is quite windy! Oh wait I don't have a kite.. I could make a kite out of.. looks around the room... Freyja. Freyja is my cat by the way.. she is the loveliest, laziest cat in the entire world.. she makes garfield look like a little bristling ball of energy. I have a cat that doesn't like to go outside, except to sit on the dustbin outside the window looking into the house (which I'm sure is a perfect example of artists 'human condition' but applied to cats - which would make it the 'feline condition' but it can't be. The 'feline condition' seems like it should be 'the feline must always be on the other side of a door than it wants to be'. This keeps concurrent with the themes of repetition and no matter what you do, th situation is still the same. Really the 'feline condition' and the 'human condition' are one and the same thing. This would suggest some kind of link on an animal level between Man and Cat. Are we in essence the same thing?? Are Man and Cat one?? Does anyone care?? I thought not!!) Where was I. oh yeah... Freyja could be a kite in the following way 1. Remove all guts and intenstines (remember to save these, we'll need them later 2. Remove and clean all bones. 3. Carefully removes the skin and cut it to shape. 4. Clean skin carefully 5. Tap the tree at the bottom of the garden and remove a bowlful of sap. 6. Soak the skin evenly with the sap, stretch on a frame and leave to dry. 7. Stretch, twist and pull the intenstines till we have about 20 metres of catgut string. 8. Select the longest straightest bones and bind them into a diamond shape using small pieces of catgut. 9. Attach the now-dried skin to the bones with more catgut 10. This will leave about 15 metres of catgut. Attach this to the bottom of the kite frame. 11. Finally, the piece-a-la-resistance, ties the other end of the catgut to the lower jawbone, and ravel the catgut up. One finished Freyja kite.. WTF am I talking about.. I must be bored.. ah well Guess I'm gonna go to the cash machine and then find something more interesting to do Peace Wheeler xx

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March 24th, 2005

Current Music: The Start - Like Days Subject: Something strange is happening in the basement! Time: 11:51 am Current Mood: Eyes Pulsating

Well what can i say other than 'something strange is happening in the basement' Well this might seem an odd thing to say, considering I don't have a basement and all but that was the text message I got from a friend I hadn't seen for about 9 months. Out of the blue... nothing else just.. something strange is happening in the basement. This put me back a little and so I thought I'd reply with the obvious answer.. 'WTF! whats happening in your basement' to which the reply was 'its starting to get wet'. As much as I tried I couldn't keep the inuendo and smut from raising a wry smile on my otherwise confused face. This could be a serious sitution requiring an experianced professional - the 24hour plumber, or it could be purely sent for amusement! I had to find out, but how... should I send the plumber (provides both a plumbing solution - or the humour value ).. oh this reminds me.. (RULE NUMBER 1: never interrupt one story with another disrupts the whole flow but nevermind, just keep kate being wet, in your mind ) When I worked at british 'evil' gas on the 'I need an engineer NOW' line, I recieved a telephone call from somebody who had a leak in thier front room. Okay, I asked, have you turned of the mains water tap, which will usually located in under the stairs, in the cellar (see the link to the orignal story now??), or under the sink. 'I will check' says the callee.. tense moments later (during which time I no doubt pressed the hold button and drunk some tea).. 'its off', a person still in the faded flushes of youth says, 'but theres still a leak in my front room'.. The drama is high.. carefully considering my next question to avioud being tied down in extraneous quizing, I asked 'How big a leak is it' - the answer, in a pseudo-welsh accent 'Its the biggest damn leek I've ever seen daffid. Its huge. I should enter it into one of those novelty vegetable competions. Its a whopper' - followed by fits of laughter and then the dead tone.. ahh memories (RULE NUMBER 2: carefully consider any questions to anyone - it could be a wind-up, anyway back to kate and her wetness ) ..so I reply with 'so you want me come round and sort out the problem with your wetness'.. to which several tense minutes later followed up with the reply - 'dont worry I've sorted it myself now xx'.. I replied but there was no answer again.. WTF!.. maybe it was all innocent, maybe my dirty mind just twisted a moment of panic about flooding basements into something more entertaining, perhaps as a way to fill the boring moments in the day.. I'll never know!!! Anyway.. thats the exitement of my week.. other than I learnt 4 chords I havn't used before -E wonder chord- -E minor-major- -E minor 9th Diminished 7th- -E 11th- grr I hate E its all so nice... bring on A anyday lol Anyway must go...got to have a shave and it takes a long time for the bleeding to stop afterwards. xx PS.. Thanks Helen for pointing out The Start, i had no idea about them being Aimee Echo's new band... xxx

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March 23rd, 2005

Current Music: Together We Summon The Dark - Abyssos Subject: Gah.. Time: 12:17 pm Current Mood: Evil

Well all.. nothing exciting in m life.. just been playin... lots of guitar.. lots.. not that I have nothing better to do with my life but i probably played about 20 hours of guitar in the last 2 days.. ouch.. Oh and my sim card has failed in my phone again.. so if anyone would possibly want to get in touch then it s gonna have to be the good old email I'm afraid... or just send a message thru MSN Messenger.. it'll be online even if i'm not there so just send you message and I'll get it when I'm near the computer. Wheeler xx

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March 18th, 2005

Current Music: Wednesday 13 - Bad Things Subject: Gahh! Time: 01:45 am Current Mood: Poorly

Gah! How Ill am I? Very is the answer... think I'm gonna sleep forever and maybe I'll actually be able to breathe in the morning ( assuming, that is, that i don't suffocate in my sleep ) Night Night All Wheeler xx

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March 9th, 2005

Current Music: Sigur Ros - Agaetis Byryun Subject: Dum De Dum! Time: 12:16 am Current Mood: Silly

Hey Can't really think of anything to write.. spent most of the day fixing MSN on peoples computers... gah.. Then went home and watched "Spawn of Chuckie" or something like that which was quite funny in places as chucky runs Britney Spears off the road, and Redman gets his balls cut off!! Thats about the excitment of today. Any ideas for fancy dress anyone?? Peace Wheeler xx

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March 8th, 2005

Current Music: Nine Inch Nails - Pretty Hate Machine Subject: <3 Time: 08:19 pm Current Mood: devilish

i'm drunk and right now i'm so in love with you and i don't want to think too much about what we should or shouldn't do lay my hands on heaven and the sun and the moon and the stars while the devil wants to fuck me in the back of his car nothing quite like the feel of something new maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up in you maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up in you maybe i'm all messed up this is the only time i really feel alive this is the only time i really feel alive i swear i just found everything i need the sweat in your eyes the blood in your veins are listening to me well i want to drink it up and swim in it until i drown my moral standing is lying down nothing quite like the feel of something new maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up in you maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up maybe i'm all messed up in you maybe i'm all messed up this is the only time i really feel alive this is the only time i really feel alive

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March 5th, 2005

Current Music: DIN-ST - YAMU d'-DIN Subject: Another day.. another Monkey Time: 06:52 pm Current Mood: Smiley Happy

Okay.. Well havn't updated for a good while now. So what interesting things have happened in my life?? Working alot.. uninteresting crap really, apart from a customer seems to thing that an acurate description of an multigang plug cable (plug extension with extra sockets on it for those who wonder ) was.. 'the whirly spinny thing' - I mean what the fuck. On Thursday I got Pierced.. twice on my neck, the top one was in the same place as the old one which had migrated, but the second is slightly lower. Tony in the shop kept saying how cool they looked. Which is good. But it is his job to say that.. lol On Thursday night I was bored so went to the SU.. its six weeks time til I start DJ'ing there. I'm just worried about all the requests for the pop crap I'm going to asked for, but I'll just pretend that I've already played it, or claim that I will play it and never do.. haha... I feel a burst of garage rock will Invade for a short while, and obviously lots of metal/nu-metal. They'll also, of course, be your usual helping of Punk-Pop and Emo.. but probably not McFly (sorry Helen - in fact no I'm not at all sorry; I'm too busy laughing).. anyway where was I.. oh yeah. I was at the SU and theres wasn't a huge amount of people there I knew, but Kat was there so it was okay. Sat there talking to Kat most of the night. Stuart (bar manager) decided that he was going to ban everyone from the pool room, so me and Kat were the only people allowed in there. That made us the people who had to stop everyone coming in, and for some reason everyone bar 3 people listened to us, but they left anyway 'cos theres was no-one else in there.. haha.. why would anyone listen to us!! And onto Last Night... Last Night was Fun, nothing hugely eventful happened however apart from Scott accused me of being upset, which I wasn't.. at all.. in the slightest.. WTF!!! Then I went home! Anyway I have to go out now but I'll update you on todays events in a bit.. went shopping with Helen and Laura and had so much fun will have to be your brief summary for now (hehe) Helen still wants me to name my first Guitar 'Helen' hehe Peace Wheeler xx PS. These are the contents of my latest Vinyl Exchange 'Lucky Dip' bag of albums: Gloss - Pop edged with a hint of something deeper / more sinister ( not that bad really bu not great ) Tananas - Formula World-Jazz ( Live ) Technikart French Tour Sampler - Compilation of Tradmark French Chart Dance ( say no more ) Urbanstarts Volume 1 - R&B remix's ( hmm.. this is music?? ) Trabant - Icelandic Electronica Rock ( okay sounds a bit like Sigur Ros but surprisingly refreshing I quite like this one ) Sodastream - Acoustic almost Folk ( pretty fly.. as they say ) The Bush, The Tree and Me - Erm.. Girly Pop-Rock ( not bad.. but if Graham Coxon isn't involved in some way with this I'll eat Laura's new hat ) Trigger Happy TV Series 2 - Compilation of song from series 2 ( meh.. some good tracks some not ) Lazy Dog Ben Watt Mix - CD of the famous London Club night ( not my cup o'tea!! ) Stereo Sushi - REALLY bad progressive house music ( says it all really ) Total Science - Drum 'n bass / electro ( alright for its genre I suppose ) 4V1N1 - Trademark Commercial Breakbeat ( the cd annoyed me before I even played it 'cos the font used was the same as the one for the clubland CD advertised on TV ) Cass - Compilation of chilled out dance ( sure is great.. not my thing though ) Cool and Deadly - Compilation CD - surprisingly obscure tracks on here ( worth it for the Boards of Canada Track ) Deviant - Erm.. Fuck knows what music genre this is.. rap of some form ( but the clash are on it too???? ) Sven Andersson - Dance Dance Dance Dance Dance ( ahh well ) FC Kahuna Mix - More fucking crap dance ( balls ) Supreme Vagabond Craftsmen - One Man and His Guitar ( bad.. but at least its not dance ) X-Ray CD #3 - compilation CD free with a magazine ( Good tracks on here including local band 'I am Kloot' )

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February 28th, 2005

Time: 07:18 pm

*boing* *is very bouncy today* Last night I had a good night. The Nelson was fun, and full, and I played some damn good music. I would say that that is probably because I have the best taste in music ever. Ever. Ever. ( haha only joking, everyone has the right to their own musical opinion, except for Helen - Mcfly???? ). I do however have the shittest hair in the world. But I can live with that! I really don't know what to say now... I don't even really know why I keep this journal when as far as I know theres only two people read it (in fact given recent events ;p it could even be one ). Does anyone / Do you (haha) think I use too many brackets? (or not enough?) OMG.. why am I in such a strange, but strangely good mood. What has happened in my life to change my mood from royally pissed off to bouncy and happy. Who knows? Maybe its the snow, maybe just maybe!! I want to go out tonight, but I don't know where to go. Probably shouldn't go to the nelson, but I feel strangely drawn to the place. Anyway I'll probably go now.. :) Wheeler xx

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February 27th, 2005

Current Music: Wheeler - Mind Over Matter Subject: SideSlip Return Time: 05:42 pm Current Mood: amused

Okay! Been in a bit of a messed-up mood the past few days, but feeling better now. Just been letting things get to me a bit too much, but I think I'm sorted out now :) Sorry for everyone I was out with on Friday, shouldn't really have gone out, when I really needed some time on my own, but I thought it would help, obviously it didn't. Just been working and chilling for a few days so not really got that much to write today Hope everyone is coming down to the Nelson tonight.. Burning some more CD's as we speak. Hope Everyone is good and see you soon if not tonight.. Remember the words of Shirley Manson - 'The trick is to keep breathing' Peace, Love and Respect for you all Wheeler xx

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